Impressive!

Hi everyone,

I just wanted to say thank you for being so flexible with the change of plans this morning - I was very impressed with your willingness to go with the flow. It really turned out to be a great opportunity to have the kids in the service. An answer to our prayers this morning!

So thanks for showing once again what a wonderful group of leaders you are!

God Bless,
Lou

This Sunday

Hey everyone,

How did you go on Sunday? Keen to hear about it so please let me know.

This is just a quick reminder that coming up this week is Weetbix & Worship. It won't change things too much except to make the time you have with the kids a bit shorter as they will stay in the hall longer than usual.

Mark and Alice the change for you will be to keep your kids in for the whole service so you probably want to set up a table for your whole group to sit on together.

If you have any questions let me know - otherwise I'll look forward to seeing you all on Sunday morning!!

God Bless,
Lou

A Word of Encouragement

Hi everyone

Listening to you guys at Small Group over the past couple of weeks has been reminding me of how stressful exam time can be! I wanted to encourage you with some words from Colossians 3 which I used to always read and remember when exam time (or any kind of study) came round.

I recommend the entire chapter, however these verses stand out the most in this context...

Col 3:17, 23-24

"17And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him; 23Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, 24since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving."

Be encouraged that God cares about your study, and when you feel like procrastinating or giving up - remember that he cares more about the work you put in now, than the results you get at the end.

With love,
Lou

This Sunday

Hi everyone,

Great job yesterday! Thanks for getting here early and being available to pray together before church - it's a great way to start the morning & I'm always so encouraged to see you all there, prepared and ready to serve the kids!


Just a quick note to remind you of a few things coming up this week...

1. Small Group tomorrow night at 7.30pm. We'll be doing our second study on The Lord's Prayer.

2. Wed night - if anyone is interested in attending the Entering the World of Children training please let me know.

3. Next Sunday is the long weekend. Mark and I will be away as will Molly. Amanda will be here and will be the person to see for any issues. As it is the long weekend you might expect numbers to be a bit lower than usual; I already know of a few families who will be away. If you have any questions or need anything from me please feel free to contact me during the week - I'll be working today, Tuesday & Wed.

Have a wonderful week everyone!!

Lou

Upcoming Training Opportunities

Hi everyone,

There are a few training opportunities that are coming up around Melbourne which may be of interest to you:

This Wed 6th June - 'Entering the World of Children' - presented by Brent Allred who is the Children's Pastor at Crossway Baptist. This is running at St Michael's church in Carlton between 7.30-9.30pm.

Tuesday 19th Jue Using Media in the Classroom - Glen Waverly Anglican Church 7-9.30pm. If you are interested in this one please let me know and perhaps we could go to this as a training session together.


Both of these look interesting to me so please let me know if you would like to go. They are both either free or cost $5 which St Mark's will cover.

Blessings,
Lou

Words of Encouragement

A Reflection on the the inspiring life and works of Henrietta Mears...

"There is no magic in small plans. When I consider my ministry, I think of the world. Anything less than that would not be worthy of Christ nor His will for my life."

There is no magic in small plans. I am convinced that God wants us to think big and plan big. Consider your ministry. Is your focus on the week-to-week routine, on the people problems and headaches, or on the big picture? Those lumps of coal in your classroom are really diamonds in the rough. Those young people that march in and out of your church each weekend can be a marching army in the work of God. That lesson you are preparing for this Sunday might be the one that ignites a flame in the heart of the next Billy Graham or Henrietta Mears. Don't get suckered into thinking small - remember that there is no magic in small plans.

A good week?

Hi everyone,

Thanks to those who were able to make it to our first training session on Tuesday night. I welcome your feedback on this session!

To help you keep thinking through you might like to read this artice which adds another perspective on communicating so that kids understand and are changed.

Perhaps this is good opportunity for me to offer another prize to anyone who can find a helpful link and action point for us all, between this article and our session on Tuesday night.

Also, don't forget to pay particular attention this week to the language your kids use and ask those clarifying questions to see what assumed knowledge/language is present in your classes & lessons. This is an exciting opportunity for growing effectiveness & I look forward to hearing your thoughts about it when we reflect together next Tues night!

Hope you all have a wonderful week this week & I'll see you Sunday. We'll pray together at 8.50am in the Lower Lounge.

God Bless,
Lou

Change of Date

Hi everyone,

Please note a diary change - Weetbix & Worship is no longer happening this Sunday. However, it is Mother's Day on Sunday so you might like to incorporate an appropriate craft or activity into your lesson - perhaps as the warm-up activity?

Some good suggestions can be found here - I quite like the banner idea?

The new Weetbix & Worship date is june 17.

Also a reminder that our first Training Session is happening Tuesday night 7.30-9.30pm. See you then!!

This Week

Hi everyone,

I just want you all to know that I think you are excellent! I reckon we've got an 'A-team' of leaders here at St Mark's -you're doing a great job!!!

With great thanksgiving for your ministry,
Lou

Sunday Club Leader News

Hi Folks,

I hope this term is going well for you. It's been great to meet and pray with you at 8.50am these past couple of weeks! It's also been great to see you factoring this in to your arrival & set up time. Well done & thanks for valuing it!

I am writing this on the eve of heading to Brisbane with Amanda for the bi-annual Leaders 2 Go Conference. This is a conference for those working in Children & Families Ministry and Amanda & I are really looking forward to it. We hope to share lots of good things with you when we return!! Please pray for safe travel and fruitful learning for us. Thanks!

Tomorrow night, Mark will lead Small Group and finish the Everyday Evangelism series we've been doing. Bring along any tough questions you have as this will be the focus of the study and based on last week's discussion there should be a lot to talk about!!

Our first training sessions are happening in 2 weeks. These will be focused on Talking about the Gospel with Kids & Youth. If you don't normally come to our small group you are both invited and encouraged to attend for these 2 weeks. Tuesday 8th & 15th from 7.30-9.30pm at our place. This training session will be pitched at Children & Youth Group leaders so please join us!

Finally, some of the mums, leaders & I have spent a few days tidying up the Canterbury Room. I've got a 'Supplies to Buy' list as a result so if you need any supplies for your classroom please let me know and I will add it to my list.

See you Sunday.
God Bless,
Lou

What a superb bunch!! The dedicated Sunday Club Leaders.

Lewina, Amanda, Cara, Mark, Louisa, Alice, Lizzie & Molly
(missing: Kay)

I hope you like it guys!! I have a copy to give each of you either on Sunday or a Small Group next week. The group pic with the kids also looks really good - have a copy of that for you too!!

Upcoming Training Session

Hi all,

I hope you had a good time last night. I was encouraged to hear that you stuck around after the study finished - that's great!

Our first training session is coming up in a few weeks and I would like to know from you what sort of topics/issues you would like us to cover during these sessions. I don't promise to cover them all straight away but do promise to address them over time and in appropriate ways.

Please let me know what issues would be most helpful for you and I will take it from there :) (If you need suggestions to get you thinking, topics might include - discipline, teaching the Bible creatively, how to help kids pray, how to get group discussions going etc...)

Looking forward to being flooded with suggestions!!
L.

Next Sunday

Hi everyone & well done today!

It was a quiet morning but great to see the kids having fun & learning good things about God!!

Tomorrow I head off to Sydney to attend the Hillsong Women's Colour Conference along with about 20 women from or associated with St Mark's!! The conference runs from Thurs - Sun next weekend and I will be having a couple of days seeing family and friends before it begins.

Small Group will still be happening on Tuesday night - Mark will be hosting and showing the Tony Campolo sermon 'It's Friday but Sunday's a Coming'. Very fitting given that Easter will soon be here. It's an awesome sermon, I hope you enjoy it. Perhaps it will be the source of the next 'quiz'?!?!

Any questions during the week you can still contact me via email or mobile and Amanda will be in the office on Wednesday & will be overseeing Sunday Club next week so you can also always ring her if you need anything.

God Bless,
Lou

Coming Up

Photo Opportunity

- Say Cheese!

To express our joy & thanksgiving for ‘our kids’, on Sunday March 25th David Gee is going to take a photo of the entire Sunday Club plus leaders!

I've sent a note home to parents to let them know of this and to encourage them to be at Sunday Club that day. I thought you'd like to know this was happening to so you can factor it into your lesson planning (and 'awakeness' on the day!)

We'll bring the kids out of church as usual and straight into the children's playgroup for the photo - which David will already have set up ready to go - take a few pics (WITH the leaders!) and then the kids will go into Sunday Club. Parents will sign their kids in for the photo rather than in their classes.

We will then have the photo enlarged and hung up somewhere in the Parish Centre. Mark this date in your diary so you don't forget.

Speaking of 'not forgetting' don't forget to respond to the previous post with 'volunteer appreciation' ideas - what would make you feel more appreciated and/or supported in your leadership and service roles as St Mark's?

God Bless, you're in my prayers.
Lou

The $70 question

Hi everyone,

NO the title of this post doesn't mean that you are going to win $70. Sorry!

However, I do have a question for you: What would you expect from me/the church/in general if you had to pay a $70 sign up fee to volunteer as a Sunday Club or Youth Leader.

'What?!' I hear you say. You can relax, I am not going to start doing this. I would like to know though, what you would expect if I did? But, if your first thought was 'I wouldn't be a Sunday Club/Youth Leader if I had to PAY!' then please tell me why (if it's for a theological reason, that you don't think the church should charge volunteers then that's fine - I'm not going to do it.)

Once you've recovered from the initial shock - I'd love to hear what would you expect. Rather, what you do expect or would love/really appreciate as a volunteer for Sunday Club?

Please let me be absolutely clear about this - I am not going to, nor do I ever intend to, charge you to be a volunteer. You all do a marvellous job and it is a blessing to have to partake in this ministry. The purpose of this post is to find out how to better support, equip & help you as you minister to the kids and youth at St Mark's. This question might help both you and I to think differently about the role and it's associated expectations.

The prize you ask? Rather than a one off prize like last week - the prize is that the more suggestions you give the more chance there is that one of them might be something I can implement!! You might just get what you ask for :)

So, the floor is yours. If you want to you can post your suggestion anonymously - all I ask is please post them. You know the saying - help me help you!!!

If you're not a Sunday Club or Youth Leader but have suggestions; things people have done for you as a volunteer, things you've done for your volunteers, or even an idea that you think is great but haven't gotten around to doing then don't be shy - remember the other saying: share and share alike! pretty please ;)

In case you were wondering this questions wasn't my idea. If you want to find out where it comes from check this out.

Stick me on your fridge

Hi everyone,

Well done on another great morning - I saw you all doing really creative & fun things as you taught the kids about Jesus today, it was awesome to see!!!!

Hope you are going well on your '3 learnings' below - I wonder who will get a prize on Tuesday ;)

Wanted to give you some more information about the blue & yellow sheets you gave the parents to take home today. They were two devotional ideas for families to do together - one for today to talk about what they learnt at church, and another to do during the week. They can be found at www.faithtogether.blogspot.com I am going to be putting together a new one each week to go home with the kids after church. It is also possible for parents (or others) to subscribe to the site and have the ideas emailed to them this week. This is particularly useful for the weeks when they can't get to church.

These devotions aren't limited to people with families, so perhaps you'd like to take one home with you or visit the site and think about the questions & passages yourself. I welcome any feedback on this too!!

See you all on Tuesday.
God Bless,
Lou

Latest Children's Ministry Magazine

Here is the online version of the latest Children's Ministry Magazine. I highly recommend you have a look through this. I always find many useful ideas in here. Some things particularly to look at are:

- the age & idea finder. This page will show you what's in the magazine that relates to different age groups.

- the age specific sections:
* ages 3 to 5
* ages 6 to 9
* ages 10 to 12

- the teacher telegram - ideas for you!


Because I really think this magazine is a helpful tool for you I am going to add a fun element here. I am going to give a prize (a cool prize) to the person who can tell me 3 things that they learn by looking in this magazine.

Get cracking & post you replies so I can give you a cool prize!!

New Family Information

Hi everyone,

This Sunday you will find in the sign in/out folders a green form that looks like the image to the right.

This is a new form which all new families need to complete when they bring their child/ren to Sunday Club for the first time. It serves two purposes:

1. It fulfils our Duty of Care requirement: that we have permission to have the child in our care, administer medical attention if necessary and are aware of any medical or relevant behavioural concerns. For this reason it is imperative that this form be completed.

2. The form also allows us the opportunity to follow up the new family to answer any questions they may have about Sunday Club, St Mark's or faith as well encourage them to join us again. This is a fantastic pastoral opportunity we have been missing as we have had visitors and now way of contacting them.

It should be easy to manage. My suggestion is that each week you allocate one leader for your group to oversee signing in. This person can make sure that all kids are signed in and any new kids welcomed to the group and their parents given the form to complete. Completed forms can stay in the folder and I will collect them at the end of the morning. Please make sure you read the form to check if there are any medical/behavioural concerns you need to know about.

When you have a new child to your group it's always a good idea to introduce them to the whole group so that everyone meets them and learns their name. It's then helpful to link them up with another child from the group who they can sit with and join in the activities with until they get to know some of the other kids. This can help them feel welcome & able to contribute.

I know some of this admin can seem tedious but it's a vital aspect of Sunday Club - it plays a big part in keeping our ministry safe & sustainable. It may take some time to get used to the sign in/out & registration process but it's worthwhile - so please keep it in your mind as part and parcel of running your Sunday Club group.

If you have any questions about any of this please let me know.
Thanks for all your efforts!!
See you tonight,

Louisa

Email Subscriptions

Hi everyone,

Thanks for visiting this blog! I have added an email subscription option to the right of this page and would encourage you to subscribe. It will mean that new posts will be automatically emailed to you without you needing to check the site to see if I have added anything new. That way you get the info directly but it remains interactive as you can visit the site to add comments etc...

News that will be coming this week includes:
- What to do when you have a new child in your group.

If you have any thoughts/questions/suggestions to discuss please let me know.

God Bless,
Louisa

Your Very own Blog!

Hi everyone,

Welcome to your very own blog!! This is a way for me to keep in touch with you & make sure you have the latest information about Sunday Club.

It's also a forum for you guys to leave messages for each other & talk about how things are going and any challenges you are facing. However, it will only be a forum if you make it one so let me encourage you to do that!!

Below this post you will find posts of the 'hints & tips' I emailed out late last year in the Leader Emails. Each post has a label and on the right of the page you'll see the heading 'Categories'. By clicking on any of these options you can have a look at any posts releated to that particular issue.

I'll try and add a new 'hint & tip' each week so please let me know if there are any topics that would be particularly helpful and I will do my best to respond promptly with some helpful information!!

God Bless guys - I'm excited! It's a priviledge to have such a great team of leaders to kick off the year!!

Louisa

The Perfect Classroom?

What do you think of your current Sunday school room? It’s tempting to think we need to decorate it into something fabulous and engaging for our children (I know I am tempted) and then to feel disappointed when we can’t achieve what we’d like. In an engaging article by Jennifer Hooks, editor of the Children’s Ministry magazine I have mentioned previously, we encounter a different perspective. Jennifer seems to think that it has less to do with decorations and art and more to do with the following five attributes.

• Structure – Structure is the presence of an identifiable system or routine and a discipline policy that’s familiar to kids. Structure is vital. It provides kids with a sense of ownership, confidence, belonging and well-being because they can predict consequences and understand the overall function of the class. Kids recognise the beginning, middle and end of your class. They understand and have ownership of the procedures. Structure is about discipline and consistency – not legalism and rules.
  


• Problem-Solving – Adults tend to think of problems as troublesome issues in need of remedy. For kids though, developing problem-solving skills is really finding the solution to the puzzle, such as learning how to operate a toy for the first time. When kids get the opportunity to use their problem-solving skills, they’re acquiring self-esteem and resiliency. It might be as simple as asking children to think through Jonah’s predicament from his perspective or imagine what they might have done in Jesus’ position.
  


• Creativity – Kids who experience creative opportunities in your class come up with new ideas and look at situations from a new perspective. They are less likely to be fearful of new situations and more likely to express their opinions…Creative experiences are guided and related to your lesson. Creativity can be messy, so teach kids to clean up after their creative endeavours.
  


• Relationships – This is perhaps the most vital of all classroom experiences. Humans have a fundamental need for positive relationships with others, including peers and adults. And relationships really are the underlying theme of our efforts in children’s ministry because it’s that all-important relationship with Jesus that we’re trying to instil in our kids. Kids need to feel they belong, they should work together to achieve goals and be cared for genuinely by their teachers.
  


• Autonomy – Autonomy is critical to helping kids learn to believe in themselves because they get to make decisions and guide their own experiences. Autonomy results when kids feel capable and secure in their abilities; its cousin is self-esteem. Adults convey to children that they are capable, and children get opportunities to demonstrate this. Kids are allowed to run with their interested. They’re also held accountable.
  

Jennifer says ‘All these elements have something in common: They lead to positive self-esteem-building-experiences. If your goal is to make your class irresistible, focus on incorporating all of these concepts. You’ll be delighted – and kids will be excited – as each experience lights up their eyes and hearts.’

I know that I am certainly delighted to see that these elements are already present in your classrooms! I hope you are encouraged to keep working on them!

You can read more about how to further cultivate these 5 environments & why they are important in the current edition of the Children's Ministry Magazine. It’s well worth the read!

Storytelling

We all have to tell stories at some point during our Sunday Club career & I wonder if anyone else feels daunted by this task like I do?? I’ve been reading a book called The Children’s Ministry Guide to Story Telling by Ruth Alliston. Sounds relevant? Let me share with you some of Ruth’s helpful hints. I hope they help you like they’ve helped me!

1. First thing to remember: you are probably more experienced than you think!


2. Practice
Get to know the story inside out, even if you are going to read it! This will make you more confident and help you engage with the children during the storytelling. It may seem like a waste of time, but it’s the first step to avoiding the following pitfalls…


3. What if it goes wrong?
   
We all make mistakes, especially when we are new to something – it’s rarely as bad as we think. Keep trying!


4. I forgot to say something really important
   
If you forgot to say something important, stop and say ‘Oh, I forgot something very important…’ Tell what it was, and pick up the story again.


5. I started to waffle and lost the children’s attention
   
As soon as you realise what has happened, stop and ask ‘Where was I before I got sidetracked?’ Children can answer if they know. Go back to your last point, repeat briefly and continue.


6. I talked too fast
   
We speak quickly when we are nervous. Try to keep a steady pace and breathe evenly. Have an activity, song or rhyme that relates to your story, just in case you finish too soon. For older children, prepare several brief questions, or let them tell the story back to you.


7. I completely lost the children’s attention
   
Finish quickly and move on. Learn from the experience but don’t take it so seriously that you will never try it again.


8. One of the children was frightened & started to cry
   
Most children have vivid imaginations. Some are very sensitive and will easily identify with characters in your story. Think carefully about any frightening or emotionally sensitive parts, and try to find a balance between making them exciting and making too much of a drama out of them. If you see a child is upset, nominate a helper to comfort them and talk to them afterwards. Afterwards, tell them you are sorry that they were upset and remind them of any good or funny parts of the story.

At the end of it all, review yourself. Think about what worked, and what you could improve. If you see someone do a good job – tell them! If you can think of something they could have done better or differently tell them that too, but always after telling them something that they did well.

Storytelling may be scary, hard work, time consuming, disastrous or hilarious. But when you give it all you’ve got you will find it to be one of the most exhilarating and rewarding experiences of working with children!

Answering Tricky Questions

Here's a story about answering tricky questions. Perhaps it will provide you with some food for thought. If you've been asked a tricky question let me know and we can work out a helpful response together.

Tricky Questions…
A story from Joelen Roehlkepartain

Our preschool class started the year learning about God. Then we switched to a unit on Jesus. As we began another new unit, we bowed our heads to pray when Lisa asked, “Who do we pray to this time?” I paused, and stopped the prayer. When our class studied the unit on God, we prayed to God. When we focused on Jesus, we prayed to Jesus – just as the curriculum suggested. Lisa wondered who was listening today – God or Jesus?

“You’re right, Lisa,” I said. “This can be confusing.” We stopped for a quick discussion about names. I asked the kids to say their names. Then I said that I’d heard some kids called by different names. “I’ve heard you mum call you ‘son’,” I said to Josh. “And what does your grandpa call you?” Josh said his grandpa calls him Josh or Grandson. Soon we were all talking about different names and nicknames we go by – and we agreed that we respond to different names because we know the person talking, is talking to us.

3 to 5 year olds are concrete thinkers who have difficulty connecting abstract concepts just as Lisa did. To preschoolers, God and Jesus are two separate individuals – God is Jesus’ dad and Jesus is God’s son.
It was tempting to explain the abstract concept that God is ‘three in one.’ Yet while we adults understand the theological concept of the Trinity, do kids have to know that before the age of 5? We need to help kids make sense of faith concepts on their terms,

Rather than launching into a theological discourse it was enough to tell Lisa that God and Jesus are both listening, and we could pray to either one. I’ve learned to keep it simple with young children.

I want kids like Lisa to walk away from class excited about what they are learning – not baffled by something that doesn’t make sense to them. So now when it’s time to pray, I keep it simple. I ask kids to fold their hands, bow their heads, and close their eyes. Then we pray together to God or Jesus. And that’s the simple truth.

Comon Sense Do's & Don't of Discipline

Discipline, it’s often the hardest part of being a Sunday school teacher? How do I control the class? How do I encourage that particular child to participate? What should I do? How do I do it?

Well, it’s fair to say that the best form of discipline is preventative discipline. Preventative discipline techniques provide a safe, comfortable, fair place for kids to learn about God! They also make your class a fun place to be!

Here are some Common Sense Do’s & Don’ts of discipline to help you think through this difficult issue.

DO

• Do involve kids in making rules for your class; keep the rules simple and few and review the rules frequently.
  Come up with three of four rules for the class. The rules should be about respecting God, the teachers, each other, and property. Involving the kids in the process makes them more aware of the rules, and because they’ve helped create them, they are also more likely to comply with them.
  
  
• Do create a loving atmosphere where kids feel accepted ‘just the way they are’.
  As adults, we’ll do almost anything for someone who consistently shows us love and respect. The same holds true with children. The better the teacher-child relationship, the more likely it is that teachers will receive co-operation and respect when they direct children toward certain behaviours and tasks.
  
  
• Do learn the names of your kids and use them frequently.


• Do remember that you’re discipling children through discipline.
  A good saying to remember is ‘God loves me just the way I am, and he loves me too much to let me stay that way.’ That’s the attitude children need to pick up from us – that we truly accept each child even as we challenge him or her to behave in a way that shows respect for God and for others.
  
  
• Do find something to praise in each child.
  One teacher said ‘The only thing I could praise was that he didn’t go home with me.’ That doesn’t count! Kids who are constantly reprimanded (and some are!) feel beaten up. We don’t ever want children to leave our churches feeling defeated. Make an effort to praise every child at some point during every class. Verbal praise, a gentle touch, or a knowing wink of the eye can be affirming to a child. When we affirm and cherish our students, we are modelling for them the kind of loving behaviour we’re trying to help them develop.
  
  
• Do work at finding special connections with challenging students.
  If you find yourself challenged by the same child repeatedly you may need to talk to him or her outside of class. There was once a two year old boy who was rarely disciplined by his parents. He would constantly kick and hit other children and teachers. No matter what the teachers wanted him to do, he was determined to do something else. Finally, the teacher began greeting the child at the door and telling him how excited she was to see him, and how she knew he was going to have a great day doing whatever the teacher wanted him to do and not kicking or hitting anyone. Surprise! His behaviour began to improve!
  Another tactic is to involve uncooperative older children in some aspect of teaching the class. It may seem risky, but the results can be very positive. Preparing part of the lesson gives a child ownership, and when kids have invested something in the lesson, they become supporters rather than distracters.
  
  
• Do rely on the power of prayer!
  There’s nothing like prayer to help us in every facet of Sunday school teaching, including discipline! Write down the names of the children in your class somewhere you will see them and try and pray through the list regularly. Pray for God to give you ways to bond with all the children, even the more challenging ones. When you pray for a child, so many times you’ll find that God has done unusual and amazing things to draw you to that child – things that only God could orchestrate. God is faithful – pray and look for the answer!

DON'T

• Don’t use threats you can’t or won’t carry out!
  Promising dire consequences that never happen will only cause you to lose credibility with the class. Resorting to threats lets kids know that they’ve pushed your buttons and that you’re feeling powerless. Believe it or not, even preschoolers can figure this out!
  

• Don’t yell at children, ever.
  Yelling tells kids you’re out of control and they will quickly tune out. On the practical level, some day there may be a serious situation in your class when you need to shout directions. Teachers who have to yell to be heard have nowhere to go when the need arises. Try and use a signal to get the kids attention, clap a rhythm that they have to repeat, ring a bell or make up another cue for those times when things get out of hand.

• Don’t give directions in the form of questions unless you are willing to let the children choose.
  When you ask the question ‘Would you like to site down and listen to the Bible story now?’ the child has every right to tell you: ‘No thanks. I want to run around the room and scream.’ While no child would actually respond in those words, you can be that one or two will demonstrate that answer in their behaviour. If you want the children to sit down and listen, say ‘It’s time to sit down and listen.’ This also applies when administering discipline. Don’t ask the misbehaving child if they want you to call their parents. The answer, of course, will be ‘no’. Instead, give the choice of behaving or having you call their parents. When you give a child a choice, make sure you can live with the outcome. Keep the choices you offer in the realm of what’s acceptable to you.
  
  
• Don’t shame or blame a child.
  Shaming is easier to recognise that it is to define. Basically, any time a sense of scorn or scolding or lack of forgiveness comes from an adult, a child feels devalued. What the adult needs to do is discuss the inappropriate behaviour but make it clear that it’s the behaviour that’s undesirable, not the child. After you’ve helped the child understand what was wrong with his or her behaviour, it’s important to give the child forgiveness and hope. Help the child understand and verbalise how to choose the right behaviour next time, and express your confidence that he or she will do just that.

These hints and tips come from ‘The Discipline Guide for Children’s Ministry’ by Capehart, West & West